“La Guardia Adjusts to Fatherhood” | Pops Ep. 1

(upbeat music) (upbeat music) – So until about a year ago, I had no idea how much my
life was about to change. I’m like, wow, I’m about to be a
dad. It’s exciting, it’s a little
earlier than what I expected. It just started to change my
whole view, cuz now I’m starting to think, okay so what can I do
to put myself in a place where I’m still able to live
out what I’m passionate about? Just trying to be a self
sustaining artist of some kind. I know I act a little bit, I rap, I do graphic design. I’m about to bring this
child into the world. And I knew I wanted to document
it, and it just fell right in line with what I was already doing. I decided on this show, I
wanted to talk to an expert and what it is to be a baby, and who better than a baby. Thank you for joining us Amalah. First question: where do babies
come from? (cooing) (laughing) What was that? (cooing) Look, let’s just agree to
disagree. (cooing) No honestly, there are some
babies you would think came straight
from (baby crying) Do you have any phobias? You got a whole lot to say, huh? It’s just a perfect space
to be able to express what I’ve learned and then
to do it in an artistic way, listen to what she said, is something that human beings
all together go through, but to see it at every stage, people gonna learn what
not to do and what to do. What side of the bed do you
sleep on? (baby babbling) – [La Guardia] Amalah is a
full time and overtime job. – [Leah] It’s been a complete adjustment all the time. I want to be a good mom,
and I want her to be, you know stable and
happy and full of love. – [La Guardia] One of the first
things that happens when you have a child, is your whole schedule is broken down into three hour
blocks. Our mind is always on this
thing, like when is her next feed time? Who’s gonna do the bottle? You do the bottle this time, get the bottle warmer ready, put the thing in, it’s 30
minutes, gotta get this ready. Where’s the burp cloth? Put the burp cloth on, gotta make sure everything is in
place. Rock this girl to sleep. She eats in two hours, gotta do
it again. I’m, I’m, a little stressed out. Even though I’m happy that
Amalah is going through her little, her little,
what’d you call ’em Leah? What are the things? – [Leah] The developmental
leaps. – The developmental leaps. Yesterday, she stood up, on her
own without any help, right? No support or anything. But you know what that means? Last night she woke up every single hour. – [La Guardia] Some of the
realities about being a father, and a husband, it kind of
goes back to something that somebody told me early on. When they said that to be a good
father, you have to be a good husband. So, a big thing in my mind has been trying to support my
wife, and be there for her. Little things like giving
her time out on her own too, is something I’m realizing that, it just makes the whole world
better. It just makes everything
flow a lot smoother. If I’m paying attention
not only to Amalah’s needs, but to my wife’s needs. – We’re both motivated
to be our best self, for the sake of our daughter. You know, we have someone
who’s looking at us, modeling us, emulating us. And we want to set a really
good example for her. (piano music) I started to recognize
that I had depression, or something was wrong, when I was 14. I just didn’t know, to pinpoint it as “oh I
have depression” you know. And it wasn’t until I
went to college where, you know there was like a
diagnosis. The medication is a great
relief, but after giving birth, I’ve been hitting lows
I hadn’t hit in a while. Instead of me experiencing
post-partum depression right after the birth, I ended up losing all my
hormones later. Which is now. And so, I don’t have any now. And that’s what’s creating the
lows. – [La Guardia] I thought
in the beginning, oh I just need to fix things. I just need to fix it, you know. Depression, it’s just a feeling. It’s probably a choice. If I say the right
collection of positive words, it’ll just snap a person right
into place. And I realized after a while, that that was completely wrong. – I was experiencing a really
low time. And, sometimes when that
happens, I get the urge to cut, because
I want to punish myself. I’m being put on a
higher dose of medication to help balance me out again. (music) The last time we had an event
for Amalah, she was in my stomach. And, I’m just so shocked at
how far she’s come along. And how special she’s made our
lives. (singing happy birthday) – [La Guardia] So this is a
birthday party that we had been planning
for a few months. (cheering) It was exciting. We knew it wasn’t gonna be too
crazy, cuz you know, a little
girl, one years old, is gonna forget all this stuff. (people celebrating) The smash cake was the part
we all were waiting for, and that did not go as planned
at all. (baby crying) (adults laughing) – You know, after she was taken
out of her birthday outfit, and she was just in the grass, it just culminated, like,
what that moment meant. You know, her just being free
and playing, and it was really great. Come on girl. Good girl. (baby cooing) I do feel more like a father
than I did in the beginning. (baby cooing) Like I feel like in the first 90
days, I was still in that little
probationary period at a job. And so, I haven’t been fired
yet. I’m still here. And yeah, it feels good. (piano playing) (upbeat music) – [Voiceover] Watch more
Indie Lens Storycast by following these links. Short Stories: Big Impact.

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