Sometimes we’ve experienced something in our youth that made us feel really really bad. We were deeply hurt by something Something made us feel disappointed, something made us feel good But then someone else used that to hurt us So a way for us to cope with all of this was by not feeling anything We learned that at the core, feelings and emotions are not safe When we receive compliments, we brush them away We can’t really fully accept them or believe in them And when we hear something insulting, we try our best to just ignore it Try not to stand up for yourself or not get involved, whether something is positive or negative It needs to be suppressed Apathy is struggling to feel or express emotion. It’s not so much that… You can never feel anything, but mostly you don’t feel anything It’s a blank state of being; you know, you have to do something today But you also don’t feel like doing it But you also don’t feel like doing anything else and everyday, it tears at you until eventually you start to question, Why did I want to do this to begin with? Feeling is not just emotion, but also a way for us to guide ourselves How do we decide on what we want to do today? How do we find what we genuinely enjoy? That is why when we start to suppress feeling, we start to feel like something about us is broken When we are emotionless, we feel confused. Like we don’t really know ourselves. We feel directionless, That we have no plan for anything to do because we don’t want to do anything anyway And we feel hopeless but in the end nothing will really turn out good anyway If we were to decide to reject apathy It wouldn’t be that we suddenly believe everything has to be positive that the goal is to always be happy and that no matter what, Everything will work out in the end it’s recognizing that both good things and bad things happen and it’s because of that, that we can take action. If we decide to feel again, we might have a lot of doubts We might fear that things will swing too far and that our feelings will become, OVERBEARING and now instead we are completely driven by emotion But it’s not something we have to fear, because what we’re really teaching ourselves is that we can TRUST ourselves We might also fear that feelings and emotions are illogical but it goes against all logic and reason but Really? We’re only using our feelings to guide ourselves To not feel ashamed of what we want or what to achieve or when we fail to get there to let us be ourselves and engage with others to have needs again and the willingness to go after them to not distract ourselves by Indulging in passivity and not get addicted to things to distract us. To get out of apathy we don’t need one big step. It’s not laying everything out there and saying here are all my problems in life Here are all my issues. Go ahead have a look. It’s all in the small steps. When we feel positive we embrace it. We don’t tell ourselves We’re not worthy of feeling good That we have other things to deal with before we’re even allowed to feel good. That the past and future has to dictate how we’re feeling right now. It’s accepting sadness, that it’s fine to be sad It’s not inherently a bad thing to feel but knowing that we won’t feel this way forever, that we don’t need the rumination and added distress of constant bad thoughts about how bad things are for us It’s necessary for us to feel sadness so that we can take some time to reflect and then take action from it. It’s all just small steps It can work like this telling people in very simple ways how you feel This is how I feel right now. I feel sad or I feel happy or even gratitude. I am glad you did this for me. When we talk to others It’s fine to indulge in more emotion than we might usually To laugh and smile and focus on what they are actually talking about, to maybe hang out with friends or watch a movie or play a video game simply to indulge emotionally. It’s being able to have a sense of direction in your life and not care if someone else were to judge you for it Instead you’re just feeling again, and it’s a process and slowly you might start to remember Oh, yeah, this is what I wanted out of life You

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About the Author: Oren Garnes


  1. This is such an accurate video. I was depressed for YEARS and, I've only just now, within these past few months, started pulling myself out of it. I realized that I was someone completely different that I didn't like. So, I've been working on finding the old me and, taking my experience from the version of me I didn't like then, combining them to (hopefully) make me a better person overall.

  2. Me: eh
    Me 30 seconds in: oh…
    Me q minute in: oh wow…
    Me 1:30 in: OH… WOW…
    me at the end of the video: *looks at self in mirror and sees the ghost in the video
    ”I can do this.”

  3. Probably the 100st time my moms drunk
    Yeah, i used to have emotions but i learned the hard way that emotions isnt what i need. Intelligence is.

    Did i already say she only keeps me for money?

  4. I've been struggling a lot with this over the past year. Every time I made progress, I would get overwhelmed the instant I stopped feeling any strong emotion that I would revert back to being totally depressed. It wasn't a miracle solution, but I embraced that fear, let myself experience it fully, let myself run back to bed at 2 in the afternoon to weep into my pillow or throw something around or punch something that I knew wouldn't cause serious damage. Instead of giving in to the fear, I started actually feeling better and began to feel at peace when I was merely content.

  5. Events happened in my life that made me extremely apathetic i try my best to express but it's very hard this kinda helps put a thought process in my head
    Thank you

  6. The worst thing in apathy is that when you lose passion. I've always loved music and recently I started writing it, but then I hear how my friends and colleagues have learned music for so many years and I feel they are all better than me, because I've never really learnt music in a normal usual way. When I realise this I just sit down to the piano and start playing something and then I feel that everything I play sound terrible and that I will never be able to play anything normal. But I guess I need to push myself and continue doing, because even if I will never be the greatest piano player, I can still be someone who can write decent music.

  7. I'm going through that right now. I can't be sad cuz it's gonna make it worse. I can't be happy cuz it is going to get worse and I don't wanna get my hopes up. I think this vid cleared that up a bit

  8. I’d be completely emotionless if it wasn’t for the fact that I have a burning rage that I haven’t let out in years, I’m pretty close to snapping

  9. I think, after watching this video, that any mental illness i might have are all caused by me. Besides knowing something, I don't really feel anything. I know I need to change, but not even this video gave me emotions…

  10. This video just described that feeling I cannot put into words before.
    I have a very hard time knowing what I feel and finding what I like and enjoy. It feels like I know nothing about myself and that's very confusing.
    Thank you for pointing this out, easing my fear of changing, and clarifying my doubts.
    I especially like the line "We're only using our feelings to guide ourselves, to not feel ashamed of what we want or what to achieve or when we fail to get there."
    From now on, I want to feel more, to do more, and to be myself more, and I will try to do so as best as I could. Thank you again for this video.

  11. sometimes i might have to be sad to work on a game or happy but i always wish to make more – me as an adult

  12. So. Two things from the top of my head. One. To not be able to fully accept compliments might be a good thing; it shows we have learned not to place too much of our self-worth on the opinions of those around us – people that might have little to lose from hurting us, and thus cannot comprehend the hurt they cause. Two. Apathy is a coping mechanism. Your mind is telling you 'this is enough'. Forcing you to feel something is cause of many depressive instances, so 'feeling' should not be over-appreciated to the point of exposing an ego to damage they can't currently take. My two cents.

  13. i love this video, it came at the right time because one of my friend's who i used to be close with is always bringing me down. Saying what i like to do is dumb and pointless. Which is why i started to back up from her, and found a better friend who doesn't want to basically be a plant.

  14. What happens, though, when you express your feelings, and others convince you that you are being selfish and inconsiderate of others? What if you suppress feelings so that others don't feel responsible for you feeling bad in the first place?

  15. The fact that he kept saying we the whole time made me feel like I'm not alone in this. Thank you for this. This came into my reccomended and really (as odd this sounds I'm sorry) helped me wake up in a way. I've tried things to distract myself with things like other people in my life. (Once again as dumb as this sounds) and what they feel. What they think I should do. Anytime someone is even slightly open to me talking I overshare, and its not healthy I think. I say sorry like i breathe. (Im not lying or exaggerating, if you knew me you would agree) but I feel like I need to step back. Thank you.

  16. This video is a whole ass mood I usually just say man something just isn't right with my mind should I be feeling like everyone else or am I wrong in the brain I said, I thought wow man that sucks you over there crying and shit I'm not feeling much of anything and forced something out of me cuz I felt that I'm not feeling the way everyone else is and I just kept showing these bullshit feelings to fit in yeah that might be what you call fake but I wouldn't fit in otherwise

  17. ……..This is one of those videos you happen upon at the most random of times. You watch it, and then you pause….because it just rings so well…..I enjoyed this video:)

  18. This makes everything that I have been feeling and what has happened, make sense… thank you, so so much or this video… I finally have a way to word how I feel

  19. Thank you so much for making this, I really needed to hear this today and it honestly could not have come at a better time.

  20. fuck, man… i think im gonna go cry in my bed now… i just realized ive been in my room for about a week without leaving it even going to school or the grocery store. and ive been trying to figure out why it feels like i should be sad but im not sad. why am i so emotionally handicapped?

  21. I don't fully agree with your video, and I still enjoyed it. : ) If you're somebody who wants to be positive-majority (happiness,joy,anticipation,gratitude,content,satisfaction) it's harder to shift from a negative emotion to a positive one. (it costs more emotional energy to shift between them) Apathy is emotionally neutral on the spectrum, which makes it a powerful too;. On one hand, it's close on the spectrum to negative emotions. But apathy is also close on the spectrum to positive emotions. Apathy is great because of its balance – it's true-neutral. If you're depressed, it can seem impossible to jump right into happiness. But when you're depressed, it's easier to feel apathy because less energy is consumed to travel that emotional distance. Shift from depressed to apathetic, recharge, then shift from apathetic to happy.

  22. This made me remember of the past … the time when I would play videogames just to escape from reality and to become completely disattached from my fellings because I couldn't feel anything else than bad … This video made me happy about my growth as a person as to when I learned that I can feel good just like others …

  23. This teaches me nothing on it's own. But it does a good job at reviewing and legitimizing everything that I have randomly thought about this week. Thanks for this.

  24. Thank you for this, i've been feeling down a lot usually, i think im stuck at 3:30, but anyways, thanks for reminding me that life is a thing.

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